Tunnel Vision 

In the past few months, Jeff and I have continued to dream about the future of our Tiny House. Well, specifically one dream; a dream to nestle our Tiny House into the Appalachian mountains. We want a permanent spot to call home, a new place where we can raise our growing family in a area that inspires us. We want a legacy of our own.

tunnelvision

But often, I’m learning, plans we make for ourselves aren’t the best plans. And, time after time, the door seems to be slammed shut in our face.

It hurts when the dreams you create for yourself doesn’t actually happen. Despite grand efforts, despite praying for direction and open doors, it hurts to finally realize not all dreams are meant to be.

So you try to move on, but you can’t.

I was in love with a place I had hardly visited. I was jealous of a world I have barely seen. I wanted to travel, to move, to be in charge of my own life. But see, as a Christian, that’s not the way it works. When I chose to follow Jesus, I chose to give him control of my life- even if his way isn’t the way I would have picked.

Of course, I knew all this. But yet, I continued to persist, to fight for what I thought ‘was best’. I was (and struggle with) being borderline obsessed with this idea, this obviously perfect direction for our life. I worried constantly about money, about how-to, about everything. I spent so much time worrying and dreaming and planning that I forgot to live for today, to treasure the moments I have now.

Regardless, door after door was slammed shut in our faces. I grew increasingly discouraged. I was praying, for Pete’s sake, praying that God would direct us and open or close doors. Did he want me to remain unhappy? Why would he wire me with a longing for adventure if he never intended to fulfill it?

Patience, my child.

We found a opportunity too good to be true. Despite the fact that every other effort had been closed in our faces, we jumped feet first. We fought for days to make this dream work, to ensure that we would be moving, y’all. There was no way we would fail- two people who married young,  who built a tiny house in four months, who started their own business, who gave birth naturally- we would not give up!

So, of course, this opportunity that was ‘too good to be true’ failed. And this rejection was the most bitter, the most brutal of them all.

In my quiet time the following day, the One who loves me most reminded me gently that if I am truly wanting his plan for my life like I say, then I need to trust Him. I need to wait for His calling, His timing. He has the perfect plan for our life. Of course, this plan isn’t easy or a fairy-tale, but it’s what we were designed for, it’s the very reason we were placed on this earth.

He reminded me that I need to wait on Him and His perfect timing. To pursue Him first, and all of my needs will be fulfilled. All of them.

“This God, His way is perfect. The word of the Lord proves true! He is a shield for all who take refuge in Him.”
– Samuel 22:31

So, since the Christmas season, I continue to remind myself to praise the Lord in all circumstances, to be content wherever I find myself, and to wait patiently for His timing, His direction to be revealed.

Waiting is hard! So hard. I’m not God, I can only see what is directly in front of me. I see what I want, what I can’t have. I can’t see his design, his plan, my future. Having this tunnel vision makes it hard to trust.

But He does not leave us alone. In my waiting, in my patience, He continues to speak. A direction is being formed & put together. I think, I just think, I know exactly where He is calling us. And, y’all, it scares me. It’s not the fairy-tale life I was planning for, it’s a call full of challenge and change. And, because of that, it’s almost better. I feel as though our small family has purpose again. I can be satisfied in the little moments, in the waiting moments, knowing that God hasn’t forgotten about me and his plan is so much bigger then my own.

We are pumped to share with you where 2016 will take us!

Have you had your dreams ever ‘shut down’? How did you get past the discouragement?

 

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  1. Don’t give up, I truly believe you are on the right path. I figured you all were headed to Ashland NC? Is there anything I can do to help? I really enjoy following you all in your journeys. You are a true inspiration . God bless you all!

    Scott

  2. I was choked up as I read this. I think God directed me to you for this post, if nothing else. I am 48 years old and the main dreams I had in life were for a husband and family. I waited and prayed for Him to send me a good Christian man and I thought he had, as I met my husband in church. But, after 4 kids (one passed away) and 18 years together my husband left me for another woman he had been seeing for more than 3 yrs of our marriage. This past Friday my youngest decided he wanted to try living with his father and while I understood his desire it broke my heart. So, now I am no longer a wife and it felt like my mother duties were gone also. What is my purpose now? What are my dreams? I am lost. Well, I dont know but, God knows. I have to remind myself daily that He has good things for me. It’s been 8 yrs since my divorce so waiting has become harder. But, God knows patience has never been my strong point. 🙂 and my dreams may not be the ones He has for me. Thank you for sharing your own struggles as it has helped remind me to trust in God for the future.

    1. (((((((((((pinkplateful))))))))))) You are Christ’s precious Bride, adored as his True love. He loves you forever and will never leave or forsake you, Darling. He has gone to prepare a place just for you. He promised he will return for you. Please Never forget that.<3

  3. Veronica, The Lord will guide you in your efforts for success. The path is long & you are just at the beginning portion of the path. Your young Joy needs time with you first. This is a year for patience, truly. First off, I believe your path really begins with your writings. You were born to write. You can write your dreams & thoughts & have a book worth reading that might help you financially to assist you in finding your dreams. Jeff takes pictures & you could write articles. Structure your idea for a book. This is just a suggestion. I am an Accountant & a writer. I have a book of miracles that a publisher wanted but I have to make sure it’s exactly as I want it fort. Hey, maybe y’all can start by creating a child’s book. You could make Joy the star of the book. I believe in you & eventually you will find your dreams became reality. It’s at your fingertips. Hugs….

  4. Along the way to finding your dreams, why don’t you write a series of online books called The Books of Joy and make it a Children’s book volume series. They don’t have to be long & you can be creative & have fun doing it together. Your illustrations can be from Jeff taking the original photos & making them into more of a cartoon like or childlike appearance. And, you Veronica should do the writing with Jeff helping with creative enhancement. You get a copyright for each from Library of Congress & submit afterwards to several publishers for either hardback or online publishing. If you are good then they will help pay for it. Then, walla you will have more income to find your dreams. Hugs

    1. You have a great idea! They are so talented, I just know they will glorify God no matter what they choose.. For they are willing and waiting on his Direction. This is awesome! (^_^)/

  5. Hey my Friends! ((((((((((JEFFVERONICAJOY)))))))
    I’m at the optometrist right now, waiting for the Dr to come in, but I just wanted you to know I’m here for ya’ll <3 Heavenly FATHER says " I have plans not to harm you, but give you a sure hope and future" Stand in His promise!

  6. “Have you had your dreams ever ‘shut down’? How did you get past the discouragement?”
    Yes. I got past the discouraged feelings over time. But sometimes there are triggers. You can get really depressed at times too. I’m the eternal optimist, but my husband has been called “the dream crusher” by people. The funny thing is, those who called him that were actually about to make some HUGE mistakes. My husband was simply warning them. But he was interpreted as just being negative. Our 15th wedding anniversary is coming up, and one thing I know for sure, is that he is very critical at times, but I learned to Listen when he has a concern. As I stop holding on to my own way, I see how very much he loves me and earnestly desires to led me the right way, Like Jesus does. And that’s biblical. Jeff emulates Christ, and gives his life for you having your best interest at heart. Veronica, I see you emulating the bride of Christ. Y’all are focused on a Godly Love. You will overcome. Your desires will change to God’s
    desires. The Shepherds rod and staff are a comfort to your soul, he will not let you down or lead you astray. You know you can trust him. Emotions can be tricky sometimes. Taking every thought captive for Christ. If it be the Lord’s will -we will go here or there, or do this or that. Counting your blessings helps put your emotions in check with God’s will. Look at what you have, God has provided. Great is his Faithfulness. Y’all will be alright, you are in GOOD hands.^_^

  7. Disappointments, I have had plenty in my years on earth, 53 to be exact. Sometimes what we think is a good idea, and then what the good idea really is to two different things.

    2015, was a hard year for me personally between losing a business, and then having to scale down due to the money problems that came from the business closing. I was devastated during the Christmas season. I always love Christmas with the lights and the joy it brings. But it wasn’t that way this year.

    God reminds us time and time again we need to be content in ALL things. And in ALL seasons of our lives. The move didn’t pan out for you, but look at the blessings you do have. A wonderful marriage, a baby named Joy that I am sure brings you joy. The fact you have a growing business and a tiny house to live in. Just to name a few.

    So when you get into a corner wondering what happened to your dreams, recall God sees more then we do. And he knows what will be best for you even when you don’t see it. I am still in the hard spot of my life at this time, but take a lesson here. Find your joy ( while you hold your Joy ) as that is where you will find your strength. When live gives you lemons, remember that the one who created lemons has your back.

    1. I can’t get out of my brain what you said about your 2015. How grateful I am for new years + the joy God gives us in all circumstances, as you mentioned. Praying for you to experience God’s blessings this year!